Coming down

Ideally I would get on disability, work on healing, do some volunteer work, maybe go to school, and at some point, when the time is right, have some idea of what to do with my life instead of forcing myself to figure it out now.

When I left my therapy appointment, I felt confident with this scenario.That was Thursday.

Before my break-down on Wednesday, I felt so optimistic about opening up my own business. I really felt like it was something I wanted and could make happen. But now, I’m not feeling it at all. I’m not feeling anything but afraid. I figure I am still decompressing from my melt down, trying to acclimate to “now”. So I try to be gentle with myself, no pressure remember? I have moments (seconds) of inspiration, but they are flashes in the pan.  I hate coming down.

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