Yesterday I was BORED! All day! Restless and anxious bored. I went to the gym in the morning and decided that my physical health needs to be just as much as a priority as my mental health. It’s always easy to say that when you’re AT the gym. These last few days has found me lounging on the couch and eating when I’m not hungry. When I was at the gym the previous three weeks, I felt pretty good. My jeans were even fitting a bit looser. Plus a lot of my thinking seems to spill out during the bike ride.

So I went to the gym in the a.m. and cleaned the apt. a bit. Then sat, and interwebbed, then said “fuck it” and took a walk downtown. It was nice out and I had planned to go window shopping at the bookstores, read at the coffeehouse, do camera work at the TV station, and go to the open mic at the local bookstore. I managed to do the first two as I just had no energy for the rest. Plus I was feeling so damn down. Like I had nothing to say to anyone.

So home I went and attempted to do a craft experiment, but got bored. Eventually I fell asleep on the couch and crawled into bed at 4 am.

Today is a repeat of the same. I’m hating being alone for so much of the day. I feel like I live the lifestyle of an 80 year old widow. So fucking bored and alone. Tonight I may go to another open-mic and a friend invited me to a club in Salinas, but I hate that place (Salinas that is). I think I’ll go home and sleep.

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