I met Michael this year at a club. He was dancing alone and was obviously having a great time. He was wearing a tunic style top, a long purple velvet skit and heels. His features are not masculine or feminine. He just is. Later that night he was sitting on the couch and I decided to go up and talk to him. “I hope you don’t mind, but I want to tell you that you seem like such a free spirit to me.” We ended up talking all night and little did I know that he is much more than a free spirit.
Since that night I have come to know Michael as the most conscious, open, and connected person I have ever met. Those words don’t even describe him really. I don;t know if I will ever find words to describe his ability and willingness to be aware and receptive in this world. Everytime I’ve talked with him I learn something new about life and myself.
Today I decided to drive to the town I once lived in. As I was driving there this morning, I was thinking about how I just don’t belong where I live in and how much I feel more at ease in the town I left. While I was downtown I saw Michael. We began talking and I told him how I had just moved and having a hard time adjusting to my job and location. As our conversation went on he reminded me that my situation doesn’t have to last any longer than I want it to.
“Thank you” I said to him “I needed to hear that”. Although I am taking this change as an opportunity to address some demons, Michael saying this reminded me that if it ever becomes a situation that is not healthy for my growth or myself, that I can always leave.
We talked about how people, places, and situations can be vibrational matches (or not) and I loved that he described how most people unknowingly will alter their vibration to match their surroundings. This reminded me to keep aware of what I’m feeling and to not slip back to trying to match this place that I live in. I am such a different person now that I truly do feel the change between me and my surroundings.
He also mentioned something that he read recently that really stuck with him. He says the book mentioned to the effect of “people don’t think thoughts, thoughts people.” In other words, you are not your thoughts. That same lesson that’s been tugging at me all year (maybe a bit longer). It’s what I was talking about in my previous post re: Rev. Deborah L. Johnson. I love how she mentions that “most of your thoughts aren’t yours” and asks “Do you have thoughts or do your thoughts have you? Who’s thinking who?” When Michael talked about thoughts coming to us and how he is conscious of that, it reminds me so much of the Reverend’s comments on how we are places of transmission to the what is in the world and that we need to question what comes to us.
I always know that he will understand what I’m going through and if he didn’t he’d be open to understanding. I also love that he transcends the lines of gender and is so in touch with and listens to his needs, intuition, and body. He is able to do what I struggle with and that is the ability to trust.
He is an inspiration to me in that I know that he’s gone through pain and difficulty to get to where he is (and I’m sure even he has his days). I feel like if I continue on this journey, I will be closer to where he is at in my own way.