Mothers Day is almost here and, even though most people see it as a “mom’s day off”, I ask that if you are a mother, that you take this time to reflect on your role as a mother. I ask this as a woman who was once a child, and now looks back at her relationship with her mother. When your children are grown and look back, what will they remember?
I also ask that if you are a father, an aunt, uncle, cousin, mentor, teacher, or other adult who has influence over a child, to take the following into consideration.
According to David Richo, children have the following five needs. Because our childhood interactions form the building blocks of our adult relationships, how these five qualities were expressed to us in childhood greatly affects the quality of our relationships with others and ourselves throughout our life.
- Attention to you, your feelings, and your needs
- Accepting of you just as you are (not judging, criticizing, not dismissing feelings, not making fun of)
- Appreciation and seen as a person of value
- Affection in healthy physical ways
- Allowing you to develop in your own way (not being imposed upon, not being forcing to stop or start things faster you are able or wanting to)
In looking at this list, how many of these needs did you receive as a child and how many of needs are you giving your child?