So I’ve really pulled back from doing ACA stuff. I use to go to our weekly meeting, a weekly workbook group, and a weekly re-parenting group. Now I just go to the weekly meeting. My whole “not dating” thing has really brought out a sarcastic and agitated part of myself (I call it my 12-year old). Since then I’ve just become tired of processing EVERYTHING!! I am tired of getting to know me right now and I don’t want to get to know me more.
My therapist reminded me that this agitated 12-year-old part of me is a good thing. At 12 I was a pain in the ass and I didn’t care. She pointed out that (even though I was probably reacting out of some kind of pain at that age) I was still very present with myself. I showed up in my own life.
As for ACA, it’s a strange thing. I feel like asking for my space is totally respected, and even though I am isolating to a point, I don;t feel as alone as before. I know they (the group) will be there when I come back around again.